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Negotiation Guide for Ms. Merkel

Sep 26, 2017

Dear Ms. Merkel

For the upcoming coalition negotiations, we recommend the following procedure:

  1. Begin negotiations with the Christian Social Union (CSU); always start with the most difficult partners first. Compromise on the quota for refugees to close ranks internally.
  2. Lead exploratory talks with the Social Democrats (SPD). There are SPD politicians who are critical of the statements made by failed candidate Schulz. Democracy requires all political parties to take ownership and responsibility.
  3. The Free Democrats (FDP) is the next negotiating partner, the FDP has not yet determined its stance and is still flexible in this early phase.
  4. Initiate talks with the Green Party (Grünen). Only accept 2 people as negotiation partners: if the Greens negotiation team comes, they will try to come by the busload.

The following tactics apply in the coalition negotiations:

  • Failure is not an option since new elections are excluded. No party should dare to utter the word “fail”.
  • Prerequisites for negotiations are childish – they should only exist in kindergarten. ("If you do not like it ...")
  • Personnel decisions are a matter for the party, not the coalition negotiations. Sentences like: "So if the minister is this, then ..." are not allowed.
  • Threats are not acceptable because they are unenforceable.
  • Critical points must be negotiated right down to the last detail.
  • Ideological and non-negotiable points are part of the same package and are decided simultaneously.
  • Deferring decisions is not an option. Sentences such as "we’ll circle back on that" are not possible.
  • After the election of the Chancellor, the coalition negotiations are over. A renegotiation is not possible.
The coalition agreement is not a declaration of intent, but set-in-stone rules for the upcoming years.

We wish you much success!

Best greetings to Berlin,

Matthias Schranner

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