Mental preparation is fundamental in difficult negotiations. There is strong psychological and neuroscientific evidence that preparation enhances the ability to think positively – especially in stressful or high-stakes situations.[1]By engaging in deliberate mental preparation, the brain activates neural pathways associated with confidence, focus, and emotional regulation[2]– laying the groundwork for clearer thinking, reduced anxiety, and a more optimistic outlook under pressure.

All too often, we approach difficult negotiations by focusing on the problem – or the crisis at hand – which may cause anxiety, tension and unease. But what if we stopped seeing the issue as a problem and reframed it as a challenge instead? This shift in language and mindset carries with it a powerful transformation: from fear to focus, from avoidance to engagement, and from defeat to opportunity.

At the Schranner Negotiation Institute, we encourage one fundamental principle: adopting a positive approach from the outset. The negotiation begins the moment you enter the room – your presence, energy, and mindset set the tone before a single word is spoken. A well-prepared, focused mindset not only projects confidence but also shapes the atmosphere, fostering a sense of clarity, possibility, and constructive engagement.

When you view a negotiation as a challenge rather than a burden, you develop the internal motivation to tackle it with enthusiasm and determination. This is not wishful thinking or blind optimism; it is strategic preparation. ^[3] Setting a negative target, such as “I must avoid losing too much”, frames the negotiation defensively. This immediately makes you reactive, preparing you for damage control rather than value creation. However, if you set a positive target, such as “I aim to reach a constructive solution”, this will influence your mindset and ultimately the outcome of the negotiations.

Whether positive or negative, your thoughts will influence you throughout the negotiation process. Setting an implementation intention can provide the framework and fuel for achieving goals, and this is supported by psychological research, neuroscience, and behavioural science.[4] Therefore setting a positive intention will get you closer to accomplishing your negotiation with success. While intentions are sometimes seen as “soft” or abstract, intention-setting has been shown to activate goal-directed behavior, increase focus, and boost motivation, all of which improve the likelihood of accomplishment.[5]

Indeed, itis wise to adopt certain techniques and phrases. As we know, words shape reality. ^[6]   The way you talk about a negotiation affect show you feel about it, and your counterpart will sense this immediately. If your words reflect tension, fear or resentment, these emotions will set the tone for the rest of the negotiation. Conversely, if you speak with calm confidence and a forward-looking attitude, you create a space for resolution.Focus on winning instead of avoiding defeat.

However, beware: under stress, you will not be able to recall clever phrases or polished sentences. When you are under stress, your brain activates the amygdala, part of the limbic system responsible for threat detection and emotional response.[7]This triggers a fight-or-flight reaction,[8]which pulls cognitive resources away from the prefrontal cortex, the part of the brain responsible for higher-order thinking, memory retrieval, and language. As a result: access to working memory becomes limited, you may experience verbal blocking or a “blank mind”,[9]even well-prepared arguments or phrases become difficult to retrieve.

The only thing that endures is your mindset. And a positive one will help you to stay strong verbally and sharp under pressure. You can also mentally rehearse key arguments in simulated stressful environments (e.g., with interruptions, time pressure, or while standing). Of course, the age-old practice of regulated breathing is also easier if your mindset remains positive: slow, deliberate breathing keeps your nervous system in parasympathetic mode,[10]improving access to memory and language. And finally, when you stay positive, you can efficiently and effectively chunk your content into three or four key points, making it easier, than with long, linear scripts, for the brain to retrieve.

Lastly, if you genuinely view the conflict as a challenge to be overcome, your language, behavior and presence will naturally reflect that attitude. Having a positive mindset – meaning looking forward to entering and resolving the conflict – will strengthen you. It will put you in a forward-leaning position mentally, emotionally and relationally. If you enter a negotiation with a negative mindset, you are more likely to view your counterpart with suspicion and interpret their offers defensively.^[11]  Therefore, we advise avoiding negative descriptions of the opposite party and instead searching for positive terms.

In short, a negative mindset will set the tone for the entire negotiation. Empirical research confirms this. A positive mindset reduces the likelihood of deadlock and fosters creativity. Those who negotiate with a positive mindset also report higher aspirations, greater confidence and a more positive perception of their performance. ^[12] Consider this: the way you think – and the way you speak to yourself – shapes how your brain performs under pressure. Be intentional with your inner dialogue; it drives your mindset, your decisions, and ultimately, your results. If, instead, you enter the negotiation with a negative mindset, your emotions will also be negative. Research shows that negative emotions lead to rejection of fair deals^[13] and premature exit from negotiation.^[14] Negative emotions reduce trust,^[15] harm future relationships,^[16] and often trigger deceptive behaviour that backfires.^[17]

Ultimately ,in negotiation, your mindset is never just your own. It shapes your words, your tone, your strategy. So don’t just prepare your demands. Prepare your mindset. Begin with clarity, curiosity, and confidence. Don’t fear the conflict. Look forward to the challenge.

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[1] Bessaraba, O., Melnyk,I., Shakhov, V., Shakhov, V., Mateiko, N., & Ryhel, O. (2022). The Role of Positive Thinking in Overcoming Stress by a Person: The NeuroscientificParadigm. BRAIN. Broad Research in Artificial Intelligence and Neuroscience, 13(3), 1-15.

Alsoin sport: Vealey, R. S. (2023). A framework for mental training in sport: Enhancing mental skills, wellbeing, and performance. Journal of Applied Sport Psychology, 36(2), 365–384.

[2] Carroll, P., Briñol,P., Petty, R. E., & Ketcham, J. (2020). Feeling prepared increases confidence in any accessible thoughts affecting evaluation unrelated to the original domain of preparation. Journal of Experimental Social Psychology, 89,103962.

[3] Lindner, E. G. (2006).Emotion and conflict: Why it is important to understand how emotions affect conflict and how conflict affects emotions. The handbook of conflictresolution, 2, 268-293.

[4] For instance, findings from 94 independent tests showed that implementation intentions had a positive effect of medium‐to‐large magnitude on goal attainment. See: Gollwitzer, P. M.,& Sheeran, P. (2006). Implementation intentions and goal achievement: Ameta‐analysis of effects and processes. Advances in experimental social psychology, 38, 69-119.

[5] Locke, E. A., &Latham, G. P. (2002). Building a practically useful theory of goal setting and task motivation: A 35-year odyssey. American Psychologist, 57(9), 705–717.

[6] For a classic, pleasesee: Austin, J. L. (1975). How to do things with words. Harvard universitypress.

[7] Ressler, K. J. (2010).Amygdala activity, fear, and anxiety: modulation by stress. Biological psychiatry, 67(12), 1117-1119.

[8] McCarty, R. (2016). Thefight-or-flight response: A cornerstone of stress research. In Stress:Concepts, cognition, emotion, and behavior (pp. 33-37). Academic Press.

[9] Fell, J. (2022). Whatis mind blanking: A conceptual clarification. European Journal of Neuroscience, 56(6),4837-4842.

[10] Luo, Q., Li, X., Zhao,J., Jiang, Q., & Wei, D. (2025). The effect of slow breathing in regulating anxiety. Scientific Reports, 15(1), 8417.

[11] Sharma, S., Elfenbein,H. A., Sinha, R., & Bottom, W. P. (2020). The Effects of Emotional Expressions in Negotiation: A Meta-Analysis and Future Directions for Research.Human Performance, 33, 331-353.

[12] Prassa, K.,Pezirkianidis, C., & Stalikas, A. (2022). Investigating the role of positive emotions in bilateral negotiations: A pilot study. Psychology, 13(8),1133-1150.

[13] Pillutla, M. M., &Murnighan, J. K. (1996). Unfairness, anger, and spite: Emotional rejections of ultimatum offers. Organizational behavior and human decision processes, 68(3),208-224.

[14] Yip, J. A., &Schweinsberg, M. (2017). Infuriating impasses: Angry expressions increase exiting behavior in negotiations. Social Psychological and Personality Science,8(6), 706-714.

[15]  Campagna, R. T., Mislin, A. A., Kong, D. T.,& Bottom, W. P. (2016). Strategic Consequences of Emotional Misrepresentation in Negotiation: The Blowback Effect. Journal of Applied Psychology, 101, 605-624.

[16]  Allred, K. G., Mallozzi, J. S., Matsui, F.,& Raia, C. P. (1997). The Influence of Anger and Compassion on Negotiation Performance. Organizational Behavior and Human Decision Processes, 70, 175-187.

[17]  Van Kleef, G. A. (2008). Emotion in Conflict and Negotiation: Introducing the Emotions as Social Information (EASI) Model.In N. M. Ashkanasy, & C. L. Cooper (Eds.), Research Companion to Emotion in Organizations (pp. 392-404). Edward Elgar.

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